Five Survival F-words
A fight-or-flight response is too binary and too limiting for our complex environments. There are at least three more F-word concepts that can assist us during times of danger — be it an explicit physical threat to one’s life or a psycho-social foreshadowing to one’s ego, reputation, or career.
Fight or Flight
Most of us are familiar with a concept of a fight-or-flight response. When confronted with a threat (or a perceived threat), animals respond either by engaging in a fight or they avoid a dangerous situation by fleeing. Whereas in the animal kingdom threats primarily exhibit themselves as physical harm to the body, human interactions add on another layer of reaction to stress: emotional. An argument with a co-worker (even if we know that it is highly unlikely to turn into a physical fight) can cause us to experience a fight-or- flight reaction. So, we either lash out at the “opponent” (be it in person or behind the curtain of social media) or we choose to avoid the confrontation and walk away.
Freeze
There is a third dimension to the fight-or-flight response: the fight-flight-freeze response. Freezing may sound disabling but it’s a defense mechanism that buys time to act on the fight-or-flight response when neither offer a vital solution at the moment.
Raise your hand, if you have ever been in the situation where you can’t fight back (a certain serious situation at work) and you also don’t have the luxury to instantaneously quit your job. Neither fight or flight are viable in certain situations.
No you don’t have to be like deer staring at headlights. That’s just too annoying — at least for the driver. Instead, “freeze” to take advantage of your peripheral vision. According to this great article in Healthline, our reaction to the fight, flight, or freeze can result in a temporary improve of our peripheral vision, as well as increase in hearing.
When hit in the eyes with a tough situation at work and not having been able to respond with a flight or fight, I froze and observed, observed for two months. Then, equipped with appropriate information, I was able to make an informed decision and an astute action.
Here is a striking example of “freezing.” One of the contorted ways to “supervise” political prisoners in GULAG was to have a prisoner stand in front of a german shepherd (for hours and even days) who was trained to attack if a prisoner were to move to the sitting position from exhaustion.
One prisoner (was described in a book that I am not able to reference), when “playing” a stare game with a dog, observed the dog’s blinking pattern. Every split of a second the dog blinked, the prisoner lowered his body inch by inch until he was able to sit down. After getting some rest, he would follow the same journey upwards to be in the standing position for the morning guards.
F$&@
The renowned F-word is not recognized as a part of the fight-flight-freeze triumvirate but let’s consider its value for life-threatening situations.
As addressed in the article “The F-word is Fabulous,” whether the F-word is originally associated with an act of copulation, this meaning is rarely used. Instead, this word and its multiple variations of phrasing have been used more an an intensifier (while certainly retaining its vulgar bearing).
A year ago (August 2019), an 82-year old Russian woman got trapped in quick sand while mushroom and berry picking in the woods. A bear took notice of an easy target and came close. This is when an exchange of intensifiers and growls began. And lasted for 24 hours. For 24 hours an 82-year old woman was relentlessly growling and yelling at the bear. The bear could have effortlessly attacked such an easy prey but those intensifiers not only warded off the bear but also alerted the rescuers.
Feast
So, what if you can’t fight, can’t run away, nor freeze, nor verbally abuse your opponent, what else is left? Feast!
Celtic warriors were known for having their own version to the fight-flight-freeze solution, except it was applied to the afterlife festivities: feasting, fighting, and f-sexing.
Fighting we have already addressed. F-sexing, sure lots of physiological benefits of healthy sexual activities. What is more interesting here is the value of feasting.
Why do we take someone who we would like to turn into our potential business partners to a business dinner? Simple. We want to address edgy topics right after their bellies are filled with hearty foods, which gives them a sense of safety: reduces a stress hormone cortisol and increases a happy chemical serotonin. That sense of safety acquired via a good old feasting, decreases the chances of having our potential, let’s say investors, having to resort to a fighting, running away, or glaciating into a freeze response.
When tomorrow comes, and a bear wanders into our life(or we wander into his), we have several choices. Probably shouldn't follow the Goldilocks example though.
